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How much is David Dellucci worth to you? If you believe the article in today's Republic on Dellucci reportedly being close to signing with the D-Backs, he's worth $4.3 million over two years. That's what it says -- "The Diamondbacks have offered Dellucci a two-year deal believed to be worth $1.8 million and $2.5 million." The only problem is that Dellucci only made about $700,000 in 2004 with the Rangers and all the previous reports suggested that the total contract would be worth about $2 million. Either the D-Backs have just more than tripled Dellucci's salary, or the Republic forgot to insert the word "between" between the words "worth" and "$1.8 million." I'll believe the latter. I've said before that I thought this was an OK signing, as Dellucci is likely to perform just as well as Danny Bautista at a fraction of the cost. Sure, Dellucci hits little better against major league lefties than I would, lending some credence to the suggestion that Chad Tracy might see some platoon time in right field against lefty pitchers, but I'm OK with this (but only at the $2 million total level).

According to MLB.com's Free Agent Tracker, the Rangers offered Dellucci arbitration, so signing with the D-Backs will cost them some draft picks, though I can't expect those picks would be high. Any picks received by the D-Backs if Sexson signs elsewhere will be worth more. Clayton, Glaus, and Ortiz all apparently were not offered arbitration, so at least that pain won't be there (depending on salary levels and contract years, there may be other pain, though)...

Finally, Andy Borowitz, master of the comedy mash-up, focuses on the sports world's two biggest recent controversies.